All I Need
by UKtvaddict
Summary: Jax is shot at Sonny and Kate's wedding instead of Kate, and Carly needs her best friend now more then ever. What happens when Jason helps Carly try to get through her grief? Jarly.
1. Chapter 1

When Jason heard gunshots, his first instinct was to jump up and start looking for the shooter. A few moments later, he realized he didn't know where Carly was. The pew that she was sitting in was empty. He completely abandoned his mission to find the shooter to find his best friend.

He heard her scream and saw a flash of her blue dress; the dress that he thought she looked gorgeous in. He ran toward her, and what he saw in front of him made him stop dead in his tracks. Jax was lying on the ground, a bullet in his chest, Carly kneeling beside him, begging him to stay with her.

Jason sat next to Carly, putting his hand on her back to try to comfort her.

"Jax, come on, you have to stay. I love you," Carly said.

"I love you, too," Jax whispered, before he closed his eyes.

"Jax! Jax!" Carly screamed.

Jason felt for a pulse on Jax, but he felt nothing. "He doesn't have a pulse," Jason said, and he started CPR. He felt for a pulse again. Nothing. He started CPR again.

"Come on, Jax. Don't do this," Jason told him. He didn't like Jax, but he didn't know if Carly could handle losing him; not after she lost Michael.

Jason felt for a pulse and this time he felt one. It was faint, but it was there. By this time, Sonny and Kate were sitting near Jax. He looked at Sonny, and said, "Feel for a pulse every few seconds. If you don't feel one, start CPR." Sonny nodded.

He went to Carly and sat down beside her. He put his hand on her shoulder, and made her look at him. "Carly, I'll be right back, okay? I have to take care of something, but I'll be back in a few minutes."

She nodded. Tears were streaming down her face, and Jason was beyond worried. Carly was strong, but one person could only take so much before…. He didn't even want to think about what might happen if Jax died.

He ran to Cody and told him to go look for anyone in the church that shouldn't be there. Jason handed him his gun. "I'm going to the hospital."

Spinelli and Maxie came into the church. "Is there anything we can do?" Spinelli asked.

"I want you to stay here. If Cody finds anything, I want you to search it, okay?"

Spinelli nodded.

"Jason, is Carly going to be okay?" Maxie asked.

Jason looked back over at Carly. She was holding Jax's hand and he saw that she was still crying.

"I don't know," he said.

The paramedics rushed into the church. "He was shot in the chest," Carly said. "Please, you have to help him."

He put his hands around Carly's waist, and pulled her into a standing position. "Come on, Carly. Let's let the paramedics do their job."

"Jase, what if…what if… why did this happen?"

"I don't know. I don't know."

Jason pulled her into his arms and let her cry for a few minutes while the paramedics tried to stabilize Jax enough to take him to the hospital. "Let's go," one of the paramedics said.

"Will you take me to the hospital?" she asked.

"Of course."

"Will you stay with me? Because I don't think I can be alone."

"I'll stay with you for as long as you want."

They sat in the ER waiting room for what felt like forever. Carly had barely spoken since coming to the hospital. He wished Carly would talk to him because at least he was used to her falling apart and talking to her.

"Carly, do you want anything? Food or something to drink?"

"No," she whispered.

He put his hand in hers, and her skin was like ice. "You're freezing. Here, take my jacket." He took it off and wrapped it around her.

He looked up and saw Monica coming out of the ER to talk to Carly. She kneeled down so that she could be at eye-level with her.

"Carly, we've gotten his vitals stable enough to take him to surgery. He's actually awake now, if you would like to see him before we take him up."

"Can I?"

"Just for a minute."

Carly practically ran into the ER, letting Jason's jacket fall to the floor. "Monica, what's wrong with her?"

She looked confused. "What do you mean?"

"Usually, when something bad happens, Carly freaks out and sometimes becomes hysterical. Now, she will barely talk. She's just staring out into space and being too calm."

"I think she's in shock. This'll hit her eventually, though."

"Is Jax going to make it?"

"He's lost a lot of blood and, from where the bullet is, his heart has damage to it. Honestly, it doesn't look good."

"If he dies—"

"My husband is not going to die!" Carly screamed.

Jason ran over to comfort her. "He's not! He can't!" she screamed.

"Jason wrapped her arms around her. "Shh," he said. "The doctors are going to do everything they can."

"We're going to take him up to surgery. You can wait in the OR waiting room if you would like," Monica said. Carly just nodded.

Jason and Carly watched as they wheeled Jax upstairs to surgery. "I need to make a few phone calls. Are you going to be okay?"

"Yeah," she said.

"Do you need anything?"

"No."

He kissed her forehead, and walked into the lobby to call Elizabeth.

"Hey Elizabeth, it's Jason."

"Jason, I was getting worried. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Listen, I'm sorry that I'm not going to be able to make it to Italy. Jax was shot at the wedding."

"Oh my God. Do they know who did it?"

"No, but I've got people looking into it. Carly's really upset right now, and I think that I need to be with her right now."

"Yeah, I understand."

Even though Carly told Jason that she didn't need anything, he went to the vending machine to buy her a coke and some crackers.

"Hey, I bought you this," he said, handing her the food and drink. "I thought it might help."

"Thanks. Jason, who did this? Do you think they meant to shoot Jax?"

"I don't know, but I've got my people trying to figure everything out."

"What if they come after Morgan next?"

He put his hand in hers and wiped a tear away from her cheek. "Nothing will happen to Morgan, okay? Do you trust me?"

"With my life."

"Okay. Then trust that I know what I'm going to do and that your son will be safe. And so will you." He just hoped that he could keep his promise.

Patrick Drake walked out of the ER, and Jason could tell by his face that the news was not good. Jason prepared himself to comfort and take care of Carly.

Jason and Carly stood up and waited for the news. "Jax lost a lot of blood, and the bullet caused severe damage to his heart. We tried everything we could, but we lost him. I'm so sorry."

Jason felt his heart sink. "No, no, you did not lose him. I want to see my husband," Carly said in denial. "Let me see him. Let me see him."

"Carly, stop. He's gone," Jason said. She started to walk away. He grabbed her to try to bring her into him, but she pulled away. She made it as far as the lobby before he grabbed her wrists.

"Jason, he's not gone. He can't be. I lost Michael. No! I want Jax!" She stopped fighting Jason and let him wrap his arms around her. Her legs gave out and Jason lowered her to the ground. He just held her while her body shook with sobs.

A few minutes later, Elizabeth came over. Jason didn't know how long she had been here; he had been too busy taking care of Carly.

"Do you want to take her somewhere more private?" she asked. He nodded. "Okay, let me take you."

Jason picked Carly up in his arms and followed Elizabeth. Carly seemed to be oblivious to what was happening; she was in too much pain to try to comprehend where she was going.

Elizabeth took them to an exam room. "I'll make sure no one comes in here. If you need anything, let me know."

"Thank you."

Jason and Carly sat there for a while. Her crying eventually subsided, and she looked up at him. "It should have been me."

"What?" he asked, confused.

"The bullet should have hit me. After what happened to Michael, I deserve to be shot. Not Jax."

It really scared Jason to hear her talking this way. "Listen to me, I never want to hear you say that ever again. I know that you are in pain, but you do not deserve to be shot. You are an amazing woman. What would Morgan do without you? He needs you, and so do I. I don't know what I would do without you."

Jason couldn't imagine what he would do if it had been Carly that had died tonight. She was everything to him, and he didn't know if he could go on without her.

"I want to see him," Carly said, wiping away her tears.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I need to see him and say goodbye."

"Okay, but then I'm taking you home."

She shook her head. "There's too much to do. I need to start the funeral arrangements."

"It's really late, Carly. The arrangements can wait until tomorrow, and I'll help you. So will Bobbie, Lulu, and whoever else you want. You need to rest."

"Okay."

Jason helped Carly stand up. "Jason, thank you for being here."

He gave a half-smile. "Where else would I be?"

"You're my best friend, and I'm so glad to have you. I love you so much."

He hugged her. "I love you, too."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The next few days were tough for everyone. It was unbearable for Jason to see Carly in so much pain. She wasn't just grieving for her husband; she was grieving for her son all over again. The loss of Jax reminded her of how much she missed Michael and how she was losing everyone she loved.

After the funeral was over, Jason took Carly home. Bobbie had been taking care of Morgan for the last few days while Jason was taking care of Carly.

"Did Morgan seem okay when he left?" she asked.

"He's a little confused as to why Jax wasn't there, but other than that, he seemed okay."

"I just hope that he knows that I love him, but I couldn't take care of him tonight."

"He knows, Carly, he knows."

"I know that everyone was just trying to be helpful, but I'm happy just to get away from everyone. I hate when people ask me how I'm doing. What am I supposed to say? I'm doing just great- my husband was just killed and my son is in a coma," she said sarcastically.

"No one knows what to say. They just want to make some conversation to make sure they know they're there."

"I just want them all to leave me alone. Except you. You're the only one I need." She laid her head on his shoulder and he put his arm around her.

"You know, your fridge is full of food, mostly casseroles. You should eat."

"I don't want casseroles."

"I think there's some frozen pizza in there, too. And I know there's a pie. I'll put the pizza in the oven while you go change clothes."

"Junk food won't make me feel better."

"Carly, do this for me. I'm asking you to eat, and I know you love junk more than anything."

"Okay, but I'm only doing it because you asked me."

Jason put the pizza in the oven, and when it was ready, he yelled for her. When she didn't respond, he yelled again. "Carly, come eat before it gets cold." No response.

He went upstairs to her room, but she wasn't there. "Carly!" he yelled. He found her in the spare bedroom, lying on the floor with just her underwear on, holding her wedding dress and crying. Jason grabbed the robe that was handing on the door and wrapped it around her, and he picked her up and sat her on the bed.

"Tell me what happened," he said.

"All my pajamas were in here, so I came in here to change, and I saw my wedding dress. I'm sorry, Jason, I know I shouldn't be falling apart."

"Don't be sorry."

"I should be strong, but it's so hard to after everything."

He put his hand in hers. "I know, but you are strong. Just think of your little boy. Morgan needs you so much. You can put all of your energy into loving him, and that might take some of the pain away."

"And I can love you," she said.

"I'm trying to comfort you here, and somehow you make me feel better. I love you, too," he said.

"I want to see Michael. Will you take me tomorrow?"

"Carly, I don't know if that's such a good idea."

"Please, I need to see my boy. I need to tell him about Jax, and I just need to see him."

"Are you sure you can handle it?"

"I'll be fine."

"I'm working tomorrow, but if you need anything, just call me."

"Do you know who shot Jax yet?"

"We're working on it."

"Was he the target?"

Jason was reluctant to answer because he didn't know anything for sure. "We don't know."

"Jason, please, tell me."

"Sonny thinks it was Karpov, but I don't think it was. I'll know more after tomorrow. I promise that when I know, I will tell you. And you and Morgan are perfectly safe."

"I thought Jax was safe, too."

"I've got tons of guards posted outside and then you'll have guards follow you wherever you go. No one will hurt you or your son."

He took a long look at her and he knew she needed to sleep. Her eyes were puffy from crying and her whole body looked exhausted. He pulled out some pills that Monica had given to him to give to Carly if she needed them.

"Here," he said, giving her a pill. "Monica gave me these sleeping pills to give to you in case you needed them. You really need to sleep, especially if you're going to go to Manhattan tomorrow."

Carly reluctantly took the pill. "Will you be here when I wake up?"

"Yeah. I'll stay until you leave." He gave her a hug and kissed her forehead, and then he walked her to her own bedroom. He helped her climb into bed and watched her fall fast asleep.

The next day, Jason went to work after Carly left to go see Michael. He was worried about her and was planning on going to see her later that night. Not long after he got to the office, Ric Lansing walked in.

"What do you want, Lansing?"

"I'd think you'd be a little nicer to someone that was coming to help out."

"What are you talking about?"

"Anthony Zacharra shot Jax."

"How do you know."

"He told me."

Jason raised an eyebrow. "He told you, just like that? Why should I believe you?"

"I caught him out of his wheelchair, cleaning his rifle. He figured since I saw him walking, he would tell me truth about the shooting. Well, I figured it out and then he told me."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Believe it or not, Jason, I didn't want to see Jax killed. I know that you're probably worried about Carly. Zacchara thinks that I'm on his side still, but I wanted you to know so that you could stop him."

"Stop him from what?"

"From going after Carly next."

Jason stopped working on what he was doing, and listened to Ric. "Are you saying that he meant to shoot Jax?"

"Yeah. He said that he's going after everything that's dear to Sonny. He thought by going after Jax first, everyone would be so preoccupied that they wouldn't pay attention. Then he could go after Carly, then Kate. By that time, Zacchara thought that you and Sonny would be at war, and he could destroy the business."

"He told you all of this?"

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry; I'm still not following. Why did you decide to tell me?"

"I've done some terrible things in my life, the worst probably being to Carly. I thought I could redeem myself."

Jason rolled his eyes. "You'll never redeem yourself for all the awful things you did to Carly."

"Okay, but when Zacchara shoots Carly, don't say I didn't warn you."

He got up to leave, but Jason stopped him. "Zacchara doesn't know that you're telling me this?"

"No, he thinks I'm still loyal and just going along with his plan."

Later that day, Carly called Jason. "Hello?"

"Jase, it's me." He could tell she had been crying and was upset. "I need you."

"Carly, calm down. Where are you?"

"I'm at the park with Morgan. Please, can you come get us?"

"Don't move. I'll be right there."

"Hurry," she said, a sob escaping her voice.

He didn't know what was wrong, but with what Zacchara was planning, he wasn't going to risk anything. No one was going to hurt Carly.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Jason got to the park as soon as he could. He found Carly sitting on a park bench holding Morgan as tight as she could.

"What happened?" he asked, sitting next to the two of them.

Before Carly could respond, Morgan climbed out of Carly's lap into Jason's. "Uncle Jason!" he exclaimed.

"Hey, Morgan," Jason said, unable to help smiling at how happy Morgan was to see him.

"Hey, Mercedes, can you take Morgan home? My men will drive you."

"I don't want to go home," Morgan said. "I want to stay here with you and Mommy."

"I know, but I need to talk to you mom about something. But I promise, your mom and I will be home soon."

"I miss you, Jason."

He gave Morgan a hug, and tears sprang to his eyes. He missed this little boy so much. "I love you," he said, before handing him back to Carly.

"I'll see you later tonight. I love you, Morgan," she told him.

"Bye Mommy," he said.

Jason waited until Mercedes and Morgan left to ask her what was wrong.

"What happened, Carly? Why are you so upset?"

"I decided to take Morgan to the park because I thought it would be good for both of us to spend time together. I was wrong though. I mean, I shouldn't be surprised. I can't ever do anything right."

"Carly, just tell me what happened."

"Anthony Zacchara showed up."

"What? Did he hurt you?"

"He said that he was sorry for what happened to Jax. He wasn't though. There was something in his voice… it was a feeling I had… I felt really uneasy. Then he tried to pick Morgan up, and I almost lost it. He finally went away, and then I called you and Mercedes."

Tears started to fall down her face. "Jase, what happened to me? I used to be able to handle Anthony Zacchara.

"Selfishly, I'm glad that you don't think you can handle him anymore, because you can't. I'm going to handle everything."

"What does that mean?"

"Ric Lansing came to my office."

"What did he want?"

"He wanted to tell me that Zacchara was the one that shot Jax."

"Why would he shoot Jax? And why would Ric tell us this."

"He seemed to be telling the truth. Unusual, I know. But I don't know why he shot Jax." He thought it was best not to tell her that she was the next target. She was upset already, and this would only upset her more. He would tell her when he knew more information.

"Do you have a plan?" she asked him.

"Yeah."

"Well?" She said, wanting to know more.

"I'm going to turn the business back to Sonny. He can deal with taking out Zacchara. I'm going to concentrate on protecting you and Morgan."

"Jase, you don't have to give up the business for me."

"The business was never really mine. Besides, nothing matters if you and Morgan aren't safe."

"I just don't want you to give up something you love."

"I'm not. I have something I love right here," he told her. "Now, you need to go home and spend time with Morgan. I'm going to talk to Sonny."

"Are you going to come over later? You promised Morgan that you would, and he would be very disappointed if he doesn't get what he wants," she said, smiling.

"He is your kid," he said. "I'll come over, but you can't cook."

"Deal," she said.

"By the way," he said, "it's good to see you smiling again."

That night, he kept his promise and went over to Carly's. While they were eating and playing with Morgan, Jason got a phone call from Sonny. Anthony Zacchara had had an embolism.

"I have to go to the hospital," he said.

"Why, what's wrong?"

"Zacchara had an embolism and he's in critical condition."

"Oh my god."

"Yeah. I need to go to the hospital and see what happens. I'll let you know," he said.

"I want to come with you," she said.

"No, stay here with him."

"Jason, do you think he'll live?"

"I don't know. I'll call you."

Jason waited at the hospital for news. He noticed that Claudia looked a little too happy for someone whose father was dying. Then again, Jason hoped that Zacchara died because everyone would be safer.

"I noticed that you don't look too broken up about your father."

"Is it any of your business?"

"I mean, I understand why you would want him to die… it would be easier on me."

"What would you gain by my father dying?"

"Everyone I loved would be safe. You know that your father was responsible for Jasper Jax's murder. And he was going to kill Carly next."

"Why should I believe you? And what's with you and that girl? Everytime I see you, she's with you or you're trying to protect her. You in love with her?"

"I don't have to explain my relationship with Carly."

"Why do people have to fall in love?"

"I said I wasn't in love with her. She's my best friend and I would do anything for her, but I'm not in love with her."

"I think you protest too much."

Patrick came out into the waiting room. "I'm sorry. We did all that we could, but he didn't make it."

Jason felt relieved. Maybe it was wrong to be happy that a man was dead, but he really didn't care. Carly was going to be safe. He had to tell her but he thought he sould tell her in person instead of telling her.

On the way home, Jason couldn't stop thinking about what Claudia had said. He did love Carly but there was a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone, right?

"Why am I letting Claudia get to me?" he asked to himself.

He knocked on Carly's door, quietly so he wouldn't wake Morgan up.

"Hey," she said. "You didn't call."

"Sorry, I just wanted to come by and tell you that Zacchara's dead."

"He is?" She smiled and gave Jason a huge hug. She let go and then her smile faded. "Am I a bad person for being happy someone is dead?"

"If you are, then I am, too."

He walked inside and they sat on the couch. "This means that you aren't in any danger from him."

"Does this mean you're not going to protect me anymore? Because if you want to keep the business, then I understand."

"It's a done deal with Sonny. He's taking it back over, and that's fine with me. And you know you would miss me if I wasn't here to look after you."

"I think you'd be better off with out me," she said.

"No, I wouldn't be. Carly," he said, putting his hand in hers, "When I heard the gunshot, all I could think about was you. I wish that it hadn't been Jax because I know that you are in pain, but I'm so thankful that I have you."

"Jase-"

"I know that you tell me that you love me and that you would do anything for me, and I feel the same way. I just wanted you to know that I don't think I would survive without you."

Carly felt tears welling up in her eyes. She loved him, probably more than she had loved her husband. She loved him more than anyone in her life, except her children. She felt him lean into her, their foreheads touching. She looked up, and their lips were almost together. She felt her lips going towards his when she heard Morgan.

"Mommy, I'm thirsty," he said, coming down the stairs.

"I'll get you some juice," she said.

Morgan stood at the edge of the couch, and Jason picked him up into his lap. Carly walked into the kitchen, unable to stop thinking about what just happened. She and Jason had almost kissed. What was she doing? She couldn't give her heart to another man, especially not Jason. She loved him more than life, but she couldn't be in a relationship with him because that meant if the relationship went badly, she could lose him. She might die if she lost Jason.

She left the kitchen with the juice and came back into the living room. She wished she had a camera: Jason was holding Morgan, stroking his hair.

She handed Morgan the juice, and Jason helped him drink it. "So, what have you two been talking about since I left?"

"You know, guy stuff," Jason said.

"Yeah, Mommy, guy stuff," Morgan repeated.

Carly and Jason laughed. "Do you think you can go back to sleep now?" Carly asked. Morgan nodded.

"Okay, I'll be up to check on you in a little while."

"He's getting so big," Jason said.

"Yeah. I think he made up the excuse that he was thirsty so he could see you."

"Maybe." He looked at his watched and noticed it was late. "I should go. You need your sleep."

She walked him to the door, and they said their goodbyes. Neither said anything about their almost-kiss but both were thinking about it. Why had it happened? Were they in love with each other? Each of them knew that their relationship may never be the same.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

A few weeks had passed since Jason and Carly almost kissed. Neither one said anything about the incident but both had thought about it.

Carly had been busy planning Morgan's birthday, especially since she usually had the help of Sonny and Jax. She hated that she had to keep Sonny away from Morgan, but that was the way it had to be. Jason hadn't come to Morgan's birthday because other parents didn't want their kids around someone who worked in the mob. She understood, even though she loved Jason and wanted him around Morgan, especially since every other father figure in Morgan's life was gone.

The night of Morgan's birthday, after the party was over, Jason stopped by Carly's house, his arms full of presents. He knew that this day might be hard for Carly without Michael or Jax, so he wanted to help.

When Carly opened the door, her face immediately lit up. Seeing her best friend always made her day better, and all the presents in his arms meant that he wanted to make her son happy. That made her happy.

"I thought I'd stop by and wish Morgan a happy birthday and drop off his presents."

"That was sweet of you. Morgan just finished opening his presents from me, and we were about to have some cake, like we haven't had enough already. Do you want to join us?"

"Sure."

Jason and Carly watched Morgan open all of his presents, and ate cake, and had a good time. Eventually, Morgan became sleepy and he went off to bed, but not before telling Carly and Jason how much he loved them.

After Carly tucked Morgan in, she came back downstairs. "He's really happy," she said. "Thank you."

"It wasn't any trouble."

"Not just for the presents. You've been such a big help the last few weeks."

"I just figured that you could use a friend. And I thought today might be a little harder than usual."

"It was hard. Michael always loved Morgan's birthday. And Jax…" she wiped the tear off her face. "I'm not going to cry."

"I almost forgot… here," he said, handing her small, wrapped box.

"You bought me a gift? Jase, you didn't need to."

"Open it."

She tore the paper off the box and pulled out a beautiful, silver locket.

"Oh, Jason. It's gorgeous." She opened the locket and it had a picture of Michael and Morgan in it. Tears started flowing down her face; she couldn't help it. She pulled Jason into a hug.

"Thank you so much, but you really didn't have to."

"I wanted to. You've done so much for me, and I just wanted to do something nice for you."

"Will you put it on me?"

He nodded. She turned and pulled her hair up. Jason pulled the locket around her neck, and fastened it.

Carly could feel his hands on her neck, and it made her want to kiss him. Jason felt the same way.

Carly turned around; her face merely inches away from his. "How does it look?"

"Perfect." They leaned into each other and kissed.

Carly broke away for a second, and they looked at each other. She leaned back in for another kiss. Neither one realized what was happening. Then, Carly leaned away.

"Oh, God," she said. She jumped up from the couch, and started panicking. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Jason. I just-"

"It's okay. I'm sorry, too." The truth was, he didn't know what had just happened either. He didn't know what was going on between him and Carly.

"Jase, what's happening to us?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean. The kiss just now. The almost-kiss earlier when Morgan interrupted us. We spend almost every waking moment together. I don't know what I'm supposed to think or how I'm supposed to feel."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kissed you. This is a bad idea."

"Yeah, it is. Except, maybe it's not. We could be great together. I love you, and you love me. But, what if I do what I always do? What if I pushed you away?"

"You wouldn't push me away."

"That's why we're just friends. The one time we were more than that, I slept with Sonny. I did push you away. I couldn't lose you again."

"Carly, that was nine years ago. You're not the same person you were then."

"Yes, I am, Jason. I slept with Sonny when I was married to Jax. I pushed Jax away. I'm the reason my son is in a coma-"

"Stop. You're Carly. Have you made mistakes? Yes, but we all have. You are Carly, and I love you."

"I love you, too. But I need time to think."

"Since when do you think things through?"

"Since it involved my best friend in the entire world."

Jason smiled. "I think that that sounds like a good idea. You can think about things as long as you need, but promise me something?"

"What?"

"That you will call me if you need anything. Because no matter if we decide to be together, you're still my best friend, and I'm still yours."

Now Carly smiled. "I will call you if I need anything."

For the next week, Carly thought long and hard about her relationship with Jason. She had decided that she couldn't help how she felt. She was in love with Jason Morgan and probably always had been.

She and Jason were going to have to take this very slow. That way, if something went wrong, they could stop and go back to just being friends. She was being very cautious because was scared out of her mind and wanted to protect her heart.

Jason was at home getting ready to do some work, when someone knocked on his door. It was Elizabeth.

"Elizabeth, what are you doing here?"

"I can't do this anymore."

"What do you mean?"

"Lying. I hate lying. I want to tell the world that I love you and that we're together. I want the world to know that you're Jake's father."

"I don't know. This is too much-"

"Don't you want to be a father to your son?"

"Of course, but-"

"Don't you want to be with me?"

"I don't-"

"I want to be with you. Jason, I'm in love with you. I love you so much."

Before he knew what was happening, her lips were on his. Then, he heard the door open. He turned around to see who it was. It was Carly; standing at the doorway with tears flowing down her face.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Carly, I can-"

"No, don't care. I don't want to hear it."

Jason chased her out the door and down the hall to the elevator. "Please, just listen to me."

"What you said about loving me? Yeah, I can see that you're in love with me."

"She came over, and I didn't get to tell her about us."

"Jason, just leave me alone for a while, okay? Coming over here was a mistake." The elevator opened and she ran into it and closed it before he could say anything else.

He walked into his apartment to face Elizabeth.

"What was that about?" she asked.

"Elizabeth, I love Carly," he said.

"Yeah, I know that. I don't know why because she's been a thorn in our side, to say the least, for years."

"No, you don't understand. I'm in love with Carly. I want to be with her.

"When did you decide this?"

"About a week ago."

Elizabeth felt rage forming inside her. "You told me that you loved me, but that we could never be together because it was unsafe. You said that I needed to protect my children. Guess what, Jason? Carly has two kids, too!"

"Yeah, and one of them is never going to move or speak again because of my life! I wasn't lying to you. I did want to be with you, but it is too dangerous. I told Carly the same thing… but we couldn't help it. We've been in love with each other for years, and it took her husband dying for us to figure it out."

"Did you ever really love me?"

"I did, and I'll always care about you, but the love I feel for Carly is more than I've ever felt before."

Elizabeth was angry, and she could feel herself about to cry. But she wasn't going to give Jason the satisfaction of seeing her cry. "I'm sorry that I've wasted so much time on you. Please don't contact me or my sons every again."

Jason sighed. He would deal with her later after her anger had worn off. Right now, he needed to find Carly and deal with her.

Carly sat in her living room, looking at a picture of her with Jax, Michael and Morgan from last Christmas. She had had it all… and she had lost it. She threw the picture against the wall and glass shattered in all directions.

"Damn you, Jason Morgan! Damn you!"

She went to pick up the glass that had shattered, but she pressed the glass into her hand. "Ouch," she said, as blood started to ooze from her hand. She was about to get a towel when she heard the door open.

"What have I told you about leaving the door unlocked?" She looked up as Jason walked in the door. She was not in the mood to do talk to him.

"I don't think you have a right to lecture me right now."

"When it comes to your safety, I always have the right." He saw her hand and the blood that was gushing out of it. "Jesus, Carly, what did you do?" He ran and got a few towels and put them in her hand.

"I threw a picture, and it broke. I tried to clean it up, and I ended up cutting myself with the glass."

He laughed.

"It's not funny."

"But this is typical Carly. Whenever you're upset, you always do something stupid, and you usually end up hurting yourself."

"Oh, so now I'm stupid. Thanks. After lying to me, I don't think you should be insulting me."

"First of all, I didn't say you are stupid. I said the things that you do are sometimes stupid. Second, I did not lie to you."

"Yes, you did. You said that you were in love with me. Clearly, you are not."

"I did not lie to you because I am in love with you."

"You were kissing Elizabeth! How can you be in love with me when you're still in love with her?"

"Come here," he helped her off the ground and sat down on the couch with her. "I love you. That's what I told Elizabeth. And that's what I would have told you had you not freaked out and ran away."

"You love me? Not Elizabeth?"

"Yes, that's what I said. God, you are the most stubborn woman I've ever met!"

"Yeah, but you knew that already. I'm sorry, but I just felt like I was losing someone else I loved when I saw you kissing Elizabeth."

"You didn't. I'm right here."

"And you love me?"

"Yes, I love you!" he laughed. "How many times do I have to tell you that before you believe me?"

"Oh, I believe you. I just wanted to hear it again."

"Get used to it. I'm going to be saying it more. I love you, I love you, I love you."

"Good because I love you."

He cupped her face in her face in his hands and kissed her. And he kissed her again. It took everything he had to pull away from her.

"Jase," she said.

"Yeah?"

"I think I might have loved you forever."

He laughed. "What?" she said.

"That might have been the corniest thing I've ever heard. Please tell me you don't expect me to say stuff like that."

"Of course not. It might hurt your 'Stone Cold' image."

"Thank you. Let me see your hand." He slowly pulled the towel away from her hand. The bleeding had stopped. "It looks better. Let me get you a band-aid."

"Wait. Before you go, I should tell you what we're doing later."

"You've made plans?"

"Yes. Morgan and I are decorating for Christmas tonight and you get to help."

"Carly, Thanksgiving's not even until next week."

"I know, but I love Christmas, and so does Morgan. And you know that the holidays are a busy time for the hotel, and I'm free now. So we're doing it tonight and you get to help. No excuses. Oh, and you can invite Spinelli over, too."

"I love how you just include me in your plans without asking me."

"Please. What else would you be doing tonight? Watching tv and eating takeout? You know you'd much rather be doing this."

That night, Carly, Jason, Morgan, Maxie, Spinelli, and Lulu all decorated Carly's house for Christmas. When Jason called to invite Spinelli, he asked if he could bring the "blonde ones" because apparently Maxie and Lulu were friends.

The house was all decorated, and they were almost done with the tree. Carly opened the last box of ornaments but before anyone could get any out, she gasped.

"What?" Lulu asked.

"These are all really old ornaments."

"Wow, these are old." He pulled out a few ornaments. "These are from…" he paused. "These are from Michael's first Christmas."

Carly pulled out more, including a reindeer that Michael had made when he was little, and another that had Michael's name on it, which was barely legible because he had written it when he was so small. The last one that she pulled out was a picture ornament- the picture was of Carly, Jason, Michael, and baby Morgan.

"I love this picture," she said. She hadn't realized it, but she had started to cry. Jason put his hand in hers. "I love it, too." He was fighting back tears, too.

"Mommy, are you okay?" Morgan asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she said, trying to smile. "How about you all finish decorating the tree. I'm going to go upstairs for a minute."

"Hey, will you keep an eye on him while I go upstairs to check on Carly?" Jason asked.

"Yeah," Lulu said, "is she going to be okay?"

"This Christmas is going to be hard for her. She misses Michael so much."

He walked into her bedroom and saw her holding the ornaments. "Hey," he said.

She wiped tears away from her face. "I'm sorry," she said.

He said down next to her and put his arm around her. "You don't have to apologize for anything."

"I was doing okay until I saw the ornaments. I was trying to be happy for Morgan…. I just want my son back."

"I know, baby. We all do."

"Oh, Jase, I know this is hard for you, too. Michael was just as much your son as he was mine. How are you?"

"Having you helps." He looked at the ornaments in Carly's hands. "Do you remember when he made this reindeer? He made the biggest mess ever!"

She smiled. "Yeah, I do. I never thought we would get the glitter up."

"I love you," he said.

"I love you, too." She kissed him.

"You know," he said, "we could just stay up here. They're watching Morgan downstairs."

"No, we need to go back down. Nothing's going to stop me from missing Michael, but being with everyone helps. And I really do want Morgan to have a good Christmas."

"I think he will. But how about tomorrow I arrange for us to have the day all to ourselves? We can just stay here, and I can hold you all day long."

"That sounds fabulous." She kissed him again. "Thank you for being here. You always make me feel better."

"You're welcome." He kissed her.

"Okay, we have to go back downstairs."

"I wish we could stay up here. I like it just being us."

"Tomorrow," she said. "Tomorrow we can do whatever we want, remember?" she said, smiling.

He smiled, too. "Yeah." He couldn't wait. He just wanted to hold her in his arms because they could just forget about everything. They could forget about all the pain and sadness, if only for a little while, because they were so in love with each other.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

It was Christmas Eve and Carly, Jason, and Morgan had just returned from the party at the hospital.

"Mommy, can Jason help get everything ready for Santa?"

"It's okay with me."

"I'd love to help," Jason told the young boy.

"Can you help me put out milk and cookies?"

"Sure."

After Jason and Morgan put out milk and cookies, Jason said they should put out carrots for the reindeer.

"Jason, do you think we have carrots in this house? Come on, it's me."

"Morgan, check the bottom shelf in the fridge. Bring out two."

"I bought some yesterday," he told Carly.

"You bought carrots to put out for Santa's reindeer?"

"Yeah."

"You're amazing, you know that?"

That night, the three of them sat under the lit tree reading Christmas stories. When it was almost 11, Carly thought it was time for Morgan to go to bed.

"You know, if you don't get to bed soon, Santa might not come. You don't want to miss Santa do you?"

"No. Goodnight Mommy. Goodnight Jason," Morgan said as he ran upstairs.

After they made sure Morgan was asleep, Carly and Jason started putting presents out and filling Morgan's stocking. Carly started to fill hers, but Jason stopped her.

"You can't fill your own stocking."

"I always do. Sometimes Sonny or Jax would put a few surprises in it, but most of the time I would just fill it myself. I'd always act surprised on Christmas morning for Michael and Morgan."

"Well, it just so happens that I have some things to go in your stocking."

"Oh really? You'll have to wait until I finish with yours. But you can't be here while I fill yours."

"Where should I go?"

"Go to the kitchen. Eat those nasty carrots, but save some cookies for me."

It took a while for them to fill each other's stockings and put other surprises under the tree, but they finally finished with all the gifts. Both were standing by the tree when Jason wrapped his arms around Carly.

"Do you know how much I love you?" he asked.

"Almost as much as I love you," she answered.

"I don't think that's possible." He kissed her, and when he was about to suggest they go upstairs, he noticed something was missing from her hand. Her wedding ring was gone.

"You took off your wedding ring."

"Yeah. I thought it was time. I am in a relationship with you, after all."

"Carly, if you want to keep it on, don't feel like you have to take it off because of me."

"I don't. I just… it was time. I'll always love Jax, but I'm so in love with you."

They kissed for a few minutes. "Jase?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you want to go upstairs?"

"You sure?"

She smiled. "Yeah. I'm positive."

"Then yes, I'd love to go upstairs with you."

They went into Carly's bedroom and slowly removed each others clothes. Carly could hardly control herself. He was gorgeous… the most handsome man she had ever seen. She was beyond in love with him… and she could never let him go.

This woman was beautiful. Jason couldn't believe he had waited this long to be with her. But he was with her now, and it was so worth the wait.

The next thing Jason knew, he was being shaken awake. "Come on, Jason, you gotta get dressed."

He looked at the clock and groaned. "It's only 7:30. It's Christmas. Let's sleep in."

"You can go back to sleep after you put on pants. You can just put on sweatpants for all I care. But Morgan gets up early on Christmas, and I don't want him coming in here and seeing you naked."

"Yeah, I didn't think about that." He put on a pair of comfy sweats, and then pulled Carly back into the bed and wrapped his arms around her.

"Last night was amazing."

"It was. I love you, Jason."

"I love you, too, Carly."

Jason swore he had just closed his eyes when he felt Morgan jump into bed between Carly and him.

"Mommy, Jason wake up. It's Christmas! It's Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas, Morgan," they both said.

"Can we go downstairs to see if Santa came?" he pleaded.

"Sure. Give us just a few minutes, and we'll be down."

Morgan left, and Jason and Carly got out of bed.

"You were right about Morgan, but I guess that's how most kids are on Christmas morning."

.

"Mommy, Jason, he came! Santa came!"

"I guess we'd better go downstairs!" Jason said.

That morning was spent watching Morgan his presents and playing with them. He was almost finished opening them when they heard a knock on the door.

"Merry Christmas!" Spinelli said. Jason and Carly had invited him to spend Christmas with them.

"Come on in, Spinelli. Jason and I were just watching Morgan open his presents."

"I brought presents for little Morgan as well."

"Great, more presents. This kid has more presents than a Toys R Us," Jason said.

"I also brought gifts for the Valkyrie and Stone Cold."

"Aw. Thanks Spinelli. You didn't need to."

Carly opened her gift from Spinelli. It was a framed picture of her, Jason, Morgan, Lulu, Maxie and Spinelli.

"I hope you like it. It was the picture taken when we were decorating the tree."

"I love it. Thank you Spinelli."

Jason opened his present. It was a pair of blue t-shirts. Jason didn't understand why Spinelli gave him more shirts.

"The Valkyrie always says that blue makes you look innocent, so I figured if you ever got into any more… trouble… then you could wear the blue shirts and maybe you would look innocent."

Carly couldn't help but laugh. "Thanks, Spinelli," Jason said.

"There's something else in there, too."

Jason found an envelope, and he discovered several gift certificates to different places around town, including restaurants and the movie theater.

"I thought you all could use them to go out with," Spinelli said. "I know it's not much… and it doesn't begin to describe how grateful I am to Stone Cold for taking me in and including me in your life with the Valkyrie, but-"

"Spinelli, I love the gift. And I'm grateful for you, too."

"We have a gift for you, too, Spinelli," Carly said. "Well, actually, two gifts."

The first was some computer game that apparently was "the gift" to give this year. Neither Carly nor Jason understood it, but Spinelli seemed to love it.

"This is what I wanted! Thanks you guys!"

"Open the next one," Carly said.

It was a key. "It's to this house," Carly said.

"I'm going to be spending a lot of time here with Carly and Morgan, so we thought that you could come over whenever you felt like it," Jason said.

"We have two spare bedrooms," Carly said.

"I really don't know what to say. Thank you all… thank you all so much."

The rest of day, Carly and Jason opened their presents to each other and helped Morgan set up his toys and games. Bobbie and Lulu stopped by for a little while, dropping off some food and giving presents for all.

Later, it was just Carly, Jason, and Morgan. Spinelli had left to go meet Maxie and spend time with her. The three of them were sitting by the tree drinking hot chocolate and watching a Christmas movie.

"Did you get everything you wanted for Christmas?" Jason asked Morgan.

"Almost."

"What did you not get, sweetie?" Carly asked.

"Michael."

Jason and Carly looked at each other, and then Carly put her son in her lap. "I know, I miss Michael, too. But I know that his spirit is here with us. Wherever he is right now, I know he's watching out for all of us, and maybe someday he will come back to us."

"Yeah," Jason agreed, "And maybe someday you will have a little brother or sister here to celebrate Christmas with us."

Carly raised an eyebrow and looked at Jason with curiosity. They hadn't discussed having a child together.

"Hey, Morgan, why don't you go put on your new pajamas and then you can pick out one of your new movies for us to watch."

"Okay," he said, running upstairs.

"So, did you mean what you said about having a child?" she asked.

"Yeah, if you want to have one."

"I would love to… but… I'm getting older and it's going to hard…maybe impossible to conceive a baby. And even if I did, I don't know if my body would allow me to carry it to term. I just don't want to get your hopes up."

"Carly, I would be so happy to have a baby with you, but if we can't, then I'll still be happy. I'm already so lucky to have you and that little boy."

"I'm lucky to have you, too."

Morgan ran down the stairs with a movie in his hand. After the movie was over, they discovered that he was asleep.

"Let's go to bed," Carly said.

They carried Morgan to his room and tucked him in his bed. "Merry Christmas, Morgan" they both whispered as they left his room. In the hall, Jason put his arms around Carly and kissed her.

"Merry Christmas, Carly. I love you."

"Merry Christmas, Jase. I love you, too."

They walked toward Carly's bedroom to enjoy the what was left of their first Christmas together.


End file.
